Keeping It All About Him

One of the young ladies that I work with recently lost her dad to cancer, after a two year battle against the disease. After his passing, her family gathered together things that he had written as he worked through the challenges to his health, his family, his faith and his relationship with God, and made copies that they bound under the title, “Ramblings: One man’s thoughts on cancer, healing and the goodness of God,” by Mark Mayer.

I was privileged to be offered a copy which I have been reading over the past few days. His writings offer an interesting insight into his doubts and fears as well as the journey of his relationship with his Heavenly Father. What he wrote was refreshingly transparent, as he struggled with his own failures and frustrations as a pastor.

I have not read all of it yet, but I wanted to share one thing that he wrote about that made a big impression on me.

One of the things Mark did was to set about seeking divine healing. To that end he attended a healing conference in Miami.

While there he was touched by the “intense and uplifting worship” that he experienced. He wrote that while he was there he felt God impress a truth upon him in the form of a question. He stated that it was as if God was talking inside of his head asking, “Mark, you want the gift of healing, but do you want the giver of healing?” He further explained that he felt that God was telling him that he needed to seek His face more than he sought after his healing.

So it got me thinking about all the times we mortals make it all about us--what God should do for us--instead of making it all about Him. Far too often we approach God in our need, rather than as an expression of our love.

I am reminded about how the truest worship is all about Him, and how the best we can offer God in return for all that He has already done for us, is to love Him and give Him our praise and our worship.

But that’s exactly what He wants most from us--for us to come into His presence through our love, praise and worship of Him, just to be there, not to ask for anything.

In seeking Him with all our hearts, we will find that which we really need the very most.


“You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” Psalm 16:11 (NKJ)

Taking A Day Off From My Life

I just have a question for you.

When was the last time that you took a day off from your life?

I’m talking about a day off from all the “have to do’s,” “need to do’s,” and all the “really should do’s” that consume each one of us and make us forget that what we “have to do, need to do, and really should do” is take a day off from our life every so often, so that we are able to deal more effectively with all those many “things” in our lives that demand our attention.

In Genesis, the Bible gives us a clear example of the key role that rest should play in our lives, when it declares that God, Himself, rested on the seventh day from all that He had done to create the heavens and the earth.

And was it because He was tired? I don’t think so!

After all, the Bible also tells us in Isaiah 40:28 (NKJ), that the “everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth, neither faints nor is weary.” No, I believe He rested to give us an example of how we need to rest, because unlike Him, we get tired!

It is also abundantly clear in the New Testament scriptures that Jesus followed the Father’s example, and took time to rest.

So that became my plan for today: To take a day off from my life.

I say that it became my plan because it didn’t start out that way.

I awoke this morning still carrying a burden of a multitude of worries and anxieties that had plagued me for most all of the workweek. Concerns about my personal life, my job, my future--both things that are within my ability to affect and things outside of my ability to control--weighed on me and frustrated me. I hadn’t really been very successful at allowing God to carry them for me.

I had gotten up and set about doing some things that I knew I “needed” to do, when I got a call from my brother. After “venting” some of my frustration on him, I made the decision to take my day in a different direction--one that could produce some positive results.

I put all those “things” on hold and set out on a course that would hopefully leave me rested and ready for my week ahead.

After pulling together some necessities for the day ahead that included my swimsuit, my MP3 player, some sunscreen, and a good, uplifting book to read, I headed for the pool at my apartment complex.

And so began a full day of peaceful rest, swimming, enjoying the warmth of the sun and the soft breezes, listening to uplifting worship music, and reading. I was soon absorbed in the book that I was reading--so much so that I finished the entire book, only then to realize that despite the sunscreen, I had slightly overexposed myself to the sun!

There are a lot of things that didn’t get done today, but I feel very good about how I spent the day, and how much more rested I feel.

Today was just a reminder to me, that while it is important to work, and to do so diligently, it is just as important to rest from that work, and give God a chance to speak to your heart.

And what about those things that were weighing on me and frustrating me earlier?

He's carrying those for me now.

So I hope that you, too, can make some time to rest, so that when you work, your work will be a nice reflection of your best efforts and not of your lack of adequate rest.

Trusting in a Great God

Have you ever known someone who seems to have a lot of faith in God, until something happens to them, or to a loved one? Then suddenly, they find themselves questioning how God could have let this happen?

The next thing you know they are mad at God. They are ready to “throw in the towel“--give up on God--just because things didn’t turn out the way that they thought that they should.

They begin to say things like, “If God really loved and cared about me, then He would never have ever let this happen!”

Maybe they go as far as cursing and screaming at God.

Disappointment, frustration, anger, and just plain not understanding overwhelm them.

I think that in part, we bring it on ourselves, because we are somehow geared to think that we need to be able to figure everything out. We think that we have to understand the whys of everything that happens.

We are all guilty at some time or another of trying to give God advice on how He should handle a particular situation. We figure out in our own minds the best resolution to our problems and then present it to God like a Christmas wish list, rather than just trusting that He knows what is best for us.

But if we could truly understand how great our God is, I think just maybe we would take a different approach in our relationship with God.

We need to begin to try to understand the greatness of God as demonstrated in all that He has created and surrounded us with.

“The heavens declare the glory of God; And the firmament shows His handiwork.” --Psalm 19:1 (NKJ)

We cannot possibly begin to grasp the greatness of His creation, the vastness of space, and the wonders of the Universe. Nor can we ever truly understand the intricate workings of our own bodies. So how can we hope to fully know the One that created it all, and fully understand His love for us?

In Ephesians 3, Paul prays that we “may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height--to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge.” Interestingly, he prays for us to comprehend something that passes knowledge.


Yes, we need to seek to understand. We should seek to have an intimate relationship with God. But above all, we must learn to trust Him no matter what comes our way. We must trust Him like Job did when he declared,

“Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” --Job 15:13a (NKJ)

It is what we are instructed to do in Proverbs, and it comes with a wonderful promise.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths." --Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJ)

In the very midst of all the hurt and confusion and pain, put your trust in Him, and even though what you are having to walk through may not change, He will give you the strength to go on. He will supply your every need!

Could it be that we don't think that God sees us and knows us completely?

“Have you not known?
Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the LORD,
The Creator of the ends of the earth,
Neither faints nor is weary.
His understanding is unsearchable.
He gives power to the weak,
And to those who have no might He increases strength.
Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
And the young men shall utterly fall,
But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.” --Isaiah 40:28-31 (NKJ)

This day I invite you to experience for yourself the incredible peace that comes from trusting in a loving God.

Declaring The Marvelous Works Of God

It's been one week since my last blog post. One week since our beautiful granddaughter passed away. In fact, I received the news that she had died, while I was writing about her that Sunday, a week ago today.

This past week has been filled with lots of tears and lots of laughter, feelings of great loss and moments of great joy.

And in the stories told and re-told by my wife, who spent the last two hours of Elania's life by her side, I have found incredible peace, comfort, and wonderful victory.

In the last hours of her life, Elania so allowed God to fill her and move through her that those who came to comfort her, were comforted by her. Those who came to be strong for her, were made strong in her strength. Those who came to calm her fears, had their fears relieved by her fearlessness. In her passing there was great peace for all who would take it.

Over the almost nine years of Elania's short life, my wife and I, along with countless others, have prayed for her. In our prayers, one of the things that Nan and I would boldly declare was that Elania would "live and not die, and declare the marvelous works of God!"

In our minds, we saw her as a young adult, free from cancer, completely whole, ministering the good news of God's love to thousands of people all over the country, forever changing people's lives.

But, how many of you know that God sometimes sees things a little differently than we do? His ways and thoughts are higher than ours, and because He knows the beginning from the end, we can be at peace knowing ". . . that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." --Romans 8:28 (NKJ)

You see He did answer our prayers. For in dying in Christ, Elania forever lives, free from cancer, completely whole. And through her life and in her passing, the marvelous works of God are being declared to thousands of people all over the country, who are being forever changed.

And that's only what's happening now! This has only just begun! The full story of her life and death hasn't even been told, yet. That story is for her Nana to write and to tell.

And in the days to come, she will write it and she will continue to tell it to all who will listen, again and again.

And if you ever read it or hear it, you will never be the same again. It simply is not possible to hear the story and not be changed!

Talk about making your life count for something! You did it, Elania! You did it!


I will praise You, O LORD, with my whole heart;
I will tell of all Your marvelous works.
I will be glad and rejoice in You;
I will sing praise to Your name, O Most High. --Psalm 9:1-2 (NKJ)

It's Okay To Be Done

“I’m done!” Elania announced to my wife, Nan, with a sigh.

Nan was rushing through the airport, several years ago, with her two grandchildren trying hard not to miss the connecting flight that would bring them back to Florida. With her baby grandson, Shane, in her arms, along with the all the paraphernalia that comes with traveling with a baby, she had been trying to encourage her three year old granddaughter to walk faster, when Elania decided she was too tired to go on.

And so, she told her “Nana” she was “done.”

“No, baby, you can’t be ‘done!’” Nan cried, more than a little panicked at the fact that Elania had just stopped right where she was. “Just a little further!”

After some pleading, Nan managed to convince her to push through and they made the flight.

During the year prior to coming to stay with us in Florida for a short time, Elania had proved herself to be quite a little fighter. She had been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. After surgery, chemotherapy and radiation treatments and a second surgery, things looked good for a complete recovery.

Life went on for the next several years, but then the cancer returned. More surgery, more chemotherapy, and surgery yet again, are the events that have marked her life over the past couple of years.

While recovering from the most recent surgery, and as she was about to begin yet another round of chemotherapy and radiation, she contracted an infection that left her too weak to proceed with the treatment. It was also discovered that small piece of the tumor that they not been able to remove during the last surgery, had grown aggressively.

There was nothing left to do, but leave her in God’s hands.

Yesterday, as she lay in her hospital bed, she told her dad that she hoped her mom would hurry up and get there because she was really tired. She was tried of fighting, and she wanted to go home.

When I heard what she had said, I knew, in my heart, she was saying, “I’m done.”

Part of me wanted to cry out, “No, baby, you can’t be done!”

But how can you say that to a child that has had to go through all that she has been through in the almost nine years of her short life. Hasn’t she earned the right to just be done?

Her mom did get there. Nan also got there and they spent last night and this morning singing songs to her, sharing hugs, kisses, and smiles and Elania even laughed.

Nan told her, "Elania, you’re so strong!"

Elania nodded her head in agreement and then flexed her muscles for Nan.

Nan said, “You make me strong.“

Then late this morning, she was done, and she went home to heaven.

While our hearts are torn and broken, we rejoice that she is free, and safely home at last.

“And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” Revelations 21:4 (NKJ)

Elania Marie Canady, September 19, 2000 - September 6, 2009

Little Miracles, High Places and Amazing Achievements

When I sat down today to write, I was surprised to see how much time had past since my last posting. Time does have a way of moving right along, especially when you are busy.

For me, the last month and a half has been packed with so many events and activities that it wouldn't be possible to share them all with you. So I've narrowed it down to three things, as indicated by the title of this post.

LITTLE MIRACLES

On August 11th, my son Chris, and his wife Charity, welcomed Aribella Grace into the world. After years of trying to have a successful pregnancy, Chris and Charity had all but given up on the dream of having their own child. But our timing isn't always God's timing. God had a plan and answered their prayers with a beautiful baby girl.

HIGH PLACES

This picture is one of the views from the top of Mt. Evans in Colorado. The top of Mt. Evans sits 14,264 feet above sea level. My sister and I hiked to the summit on August 17th. (Now you know why they are called the Rocky Mountains!)



Fortunately, the highest road in North America takes you most of the way there, since in places that high, there seems to be an extreme shortage of oxygen! (Much different than the less than 200 ft. altitudes that I am accustom to in Florida!)


AMAZING ACHIEVEMENTS

On August 26th, my parents celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary! I was in Colorado, along with many other family members and friends, to help them celebrate this amazing achievement.

Their lives have been an a true testimony of the power of faith, hope and love.


So maybe, just maybe, you can understand why I'm feeling mighty blessed right now!

The Fine Art of Flirting (How Those Sparks Keep The Fire Burning Brightly)

People often tell my wife, Nan and me that they cannot believe that we have been married for over 15 years. They just have a hard time comprehending that people that have been together that long, could act the way that we do around each other.

Well, I’m here to suggest to you that there is an art behind such a relationship. And it is an art that we have learned to do well (after all, we’ve had over 15 years of practice). It is the fine art of flirting.

Let me stop here long enough to say that not all flirting is of the “fine art” variety. There is a great amount of inappropriate flirting going on in the world, as I am sure you know.

I believe if you are married or in a committed relationship with someone, then that person should be the only one that you flirt with. Many a marriage has been ruined by what started out as “innocent” flirting.

And why does it happen so often? Because it feels good to flirt and to be flirted with, and it is probably something that is missing from their relationship at home.

But if you’re good at flirting, it feels no less “good” when you are flirting with your own spouse. It fact, I believe it feels much better, because it carries no burden of guilt with it.

There is quite a range of flirting that Nan and I engage in, from very intimate to very public. Both are important.

The intimate flirting is important because it is something that only the two of us share, which strengthens our unity and commitment to one another.

The public flirting is important because it is an outward declaration of our love for each other to the entire world, or at least as far as to those who are watching us (and people do watch). Not being afraid to show our attraction to each other in public causes trust to build between us.

Hopefully, our public flirting also serves to inspire and encourage others to work on their relationships so that they, too, can experience the joy of what we have.

Good flirting sometimes harkens back to the time when everything was new in your relationship and rekindles those feelings of excitement and anticipation of what might come out of what was only just beginning.

I recently called my wife and asked her to go to dinner with me, but I did it as if I had never asked her out before. The exchange started something like this:

“Hello, is this Nan?”
“Yes.”
“Oh hey, this is Robert. Robert McArthur? I don’t know if you remember me . . .
“Oh, yeah, how are you doing?”
“I’m good. Hey, I was just wondering . . . .”

That began an entire evening of acting like we were on a first date. The only difference was that she did come home with me to spend the night, something that would have never happened on our first date! But it was okay, because we were married before we walked through the door of our apartment!

It isn’t hard. It’s loads of fun. And it feels good.

Don’t know how to start? How about walking up to your spouse in the kitchen and saying, “So, do you come here often?” You might be surprised where the conversation goes from there.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Special thanks to Jessica for sharing with Nan and me some of the flirtations that took place between you and your boyfriend. It helped me realize that the spark that keeps things hot for Nan and me is the flirting, and it inspired me to write this in the hope that it might help others to find a way to have this much fun! From what I can tell, I think that you and Marc have this down really well. Can you imagine how good you’ll be at it after 15 years of practice!?!